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February 01, 2008

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Spirit of Vatican II

Pilot to Control Tower: We have a problem. The joystick is stuck and the plane is going straight up.

Control: Right, just press button A firmly.
...
Pilot: Hello, I pressed button A but the plane is still going straight up. What should I do?

Control: In that case, just press button A and button B together and hold them down for 30 seconds.
...
Pilot: Hello again, I did what you said, but the plane is still going straight up...

Control: Just pull the red lever on your right and all will be well.
...
Pilot: I pulled the lever, but the plane is still going up.

Control: Right, in that case just repeat after me: Our Father, who art in heaven...

Spirit of Vatican II

Bush, Putin and the Pope are traveling in the VIP cabin, with three special parachutes in their locker. But the Pope has invited a young seminarian to join them.

The pilot announces an engine failure. Everyone is very worried.

The the pilot makes a second announcement: "Sorry, folks, our last engine has failed. I am now resorting to my parachute. You will find yours in the lockers behind you."

Putin is up like a shot, dons his gear, leaps out the window.

Not to be outdone, the leader of the free world is up like a shot, dons his gear, leaps out the window,

The seminarian says, "Holy Father take your parachute quickly."

The Pope says, "No, my son, I am old and you are young, and, who knows, you may be a pope some day. You take my parchute."

The seminarian says, "But, Holy Father, there are two parachutes left! I think Mr Bush must have taken my coat."

A reader from London

Prof O'Leary: I have profited greatly from reading your essays and the illuminating comments that you post on Fr Zuhlsdorf's "WDPTRS" site. Your comments are balanced and start from less of a parti pris than most of the other "liberal" and all of the "conservative" blogs.

I will be in Tokyo in a bit over a month and would enjoy meeting you, but this site has no contact address. Perhaps you could reply using the e-mail address given with this post.

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