The farcical process of the new translations of the missal into English has taken a bizarre new twist. The final, definitive version of the English translation of the second most important text of the Roman Catholic Church, namely the Missal, is announced to the world not by the Vatican and not by the bishops but by Wikileaks.
Looking at this text, one finds that indeed it contains much bad, ungainly English. The Prefaces are horrible:
"For he assumed at his first coming
the lowliness of human flesh,
and so fulfilled the design you formed long ago,
and opened for us the way to eternal salvation,
that, when he comes again in glory and majesty
and all is at last made manifest,
we who watch for that day
may inherit the great promise
in which now we dare to hope."
The two "ands" that I print in bold type are stylistically lame, in a way that any high school student writing a composition should be able to detect. The 'that' introduces a cumbersome, lamely appended clause. Much better is the current text, "Now we watch for the day, hoping that the salvation promised us will be ours..." Anyone with an ear for rhythm can see this, but not the Vatican translators.
"we sing the hymn of your glory,
as without end we acclaim"
The 'hymn of your glory' is opaque and unidiomatic; 'acclaim' is obviously incorrect English. These two lines are perhaps the product of a non-native speaker or of a dozy committee.
Another oddity: 'John the Baptist sang of his coming' -- Perhaps the translators listened to Handel's Messiah when drunk, and imagined the Baptist singing, "Every Valley"? No doubt the Latin is canere, which means to sing, but surely has a wider connotation that would more appropriately be drawn on here. I surmise this a priori, simply on the basis of common sense. The image of John the Baptist singing is a bizarre one, an eccentric innovation.
"For in the mystery of the Word made flesh
a new light of your glory has shone upon the eyes of our mind,
so that, as we recognize in him God made visible,
we may be caught up through him in love of things invisible."
The phrases in bold are typical of the broken-backed, nerveless language of this entire translation. Another example is this, from a Christmas Preface:
"For on the feast of this awe-filled mystery,"
PEOPLE are filled with awe, not THINGS -- this is pretty basic English idiom.
The following, from another Christmas Preface, flirts with mixed metaphor:
"For through him the holy exchange that restores our life
has shone forth today in splendor:
when our frailty is assumed by your Word
not only does human mortality receive unending honor
but by this wondrous union we, too, are made eternal."
An exchange restores life and shines forth? And since when are human beings made "eternal"? Does the Latin say aeterni facti sumus? The idea of being made eternal is a contradiction in terms in any case. The two other phrases in bold type are again off-key.
Insensitivity to the used of tenses is shown in the following:
"For today you have revealed the mystery
of our salvation in Christ
as a light for the nations,
and when he appeared in our mortal nature,
you made us new by the glory of his immortal nature."
Because of the change of tense the utterance is deprived of a secure temporal location and becomes feeble and vague.
From a Lenten Preface:
"For by your gracious gift each year
your faithful await the sacred paschal feasts
with the joy of minds made pure,
so that, more eagerly intent on prayer
and on the works of charity,
and participating in the mysteries"
Again those awkward, unrhythmical 'ands,' and the drab, inexpressive phrasing at every point.
"For you have given your children a sacred time
for the renewing and purifying of their hearts,
that, freed from disordered affections,
they may so deal with the things of this passing world
as to hold rather to the things that eternally endure."
The first phrase here irresistibly evokes "you have given your children a good time" and the second phrase is clunky; the rest is drab.
"For you will that our self-denial should give you thanks,
humble our sinful pride,
contribute to the feeding of the poor,
and so help us imitate you in your kindness."
This is gobbledygook. Self-denial gives thanks to God, humbles pride, contributes to feeding the poor? The last phrase "imitate you in your kindness" is wheezy bathos.
"For through the saving Passion of your Son
the whole world has received a heart
to confess the infinite power of your majesty,
since by the wondrous power of the Cross
your judgment on the world is now revealed
and the authority of Christ crucified."
Shades of a cosmic heart transplant. A heart to confess? The clumsy repetition of 'power,' already occurring in a vacuous pleonasm on its first appearance, voids this language of its substance and makes it unprayable. The final phrase is lame indeed: "by the power of the Cross is revealed the authority of Christ crucified" -- heavily nichtssagend as if the speaker were laboring under some invisible impediment, bodily or mental (such is the effect of the false translation philosophy propagated by Liturgiam Authenticam).
"For the days of his saving Passion
and glorious Resurrection are approaching,
by which the pride of the ancient foe is vanquished
and the mystery of our redemption in Christ is celebrated."
What does 'by which' here referred to? One thinks it must be the Passion, the Resurrection, or both, since it overcomes 'the pride of the ancient foe' (a very undemythologized reference to the Devil). But no, for it is that by which the mystery of our redemption is celebrated. So it must refer to "the days" -- but again are the days those of the original paschal events or those of the forthcoming Holy Week? Again it must be the latter. So it is to these days that the vanquishing of Satan is attributed, not to the Paschal Mystery itself. The translators will say I am quibbling about straws, such is the barbaric insensitivity that they have shown continually throughout this entire sacrilegious farce.
The Easter Prefaces uses the infelicitious phrases "laud you yet more gloriously" (verb-adverb mismatch) and "overcome with paschal joy" (misplaced idiom).
Another Preface has "to live like us in all things but sin" which is intended to mean "to live as one like us in all things but sin" but fails to articulate what it is trying to say.
Here's another clumsy clunker:
"that a people, formed as one by the unity of the Trinity,
made the body of Christ and the temple of the Holy Spirit,
might, to the praise of your manifold wisdom,
be manifest as the Church."
And again:
"Nourishing your faithful by this sacred mystery,
you make them holy, so that the human race,
bounded by one world,
may be enlightened by one faith
and united by one bond of charity."
Bounded by one world? And the echo between "bounded" and "bond" is tasteless and fails to communicate any significant intention.
In no case is the new translation of a Preface an improvement on what we currently have; in most cases it is a signal disimprovement. Here is the language now to be used at funerals:
"In him the hope of blessed resurrection has dawned,
that those saddened by the certainty of dying,
might be consoled by the promise of immortality to come."
Why not keep "the bright promise of immortality"? Why not keep all the current prefaces? -- there is very little difference in content and the tinkering that produced these new translations has merely rendered that content opaque and hollow-sounding. If it's not broken don't mend it.
"For even though by our own fault we perish,
yet by your compassion and your grace,
when seized by death according to our sins,
we are redeemed through Christ's great victory."
The third line here is characteristic of this translation's failure to locate events in a clear way syntactically and temporally.
I've had enough of this dreck. It is an insult to the People of God, and to the One they seek to worship in fitting language, human language, with the "noble simplicity" urged by the forgotten Second Vatican Council.
What is noble simplicity?
Posted by: me | December 17, 2010 at 12:59 AM
NCR last May: Fr. Anscar J. Chupungco, director of the Paul VI Institute of Liturgy in the Philippines and former president of the Pontifical Liturgical Institute at Sant’Anselmo in Rome "responded to [the papal master of ceremonies, Msgr Guido] Marini's claim that the Vatican II liturgical reform has “not always in its practical implementation found a timely and happy fulfillment.”...
The liturgy envisioned by the council, he stated, “was marked by noble simplicity and clarity. It wanted a liturgy that the people could easily follow. In sharp contrast is the attempt to revive, at the expense of active participation, the medieval usage that was espoused by the Tridentine rite and to retrieve eagerly the liturgical paraphernalia that had been deposited in museums as historical artifacts.”
"Comparing the reforms of Vatican II to a springtime renewal, Chupungco lamented that after more than four decades “the church is now experiencing the cold chill of winter brought about by contrasting ideas of what the liturgy is and how it should be celebrated.” Such tension, he said, “could be a healthy sign that the interest in the liturgy has not abated.” But he cautioned that after the council, “we are not free to propound views” apart from principles established by the council."
Posted by: Spirit of Vatican II | December 17, 2010 at 11:38 AM
I'm not a great fan of Matthew Arnold, but I believe his essay on translating Homer might be a good place to start on the concept of noble simplicity. Common examples in English may be found in Shakespeare, the religious verse of Donne, and Abraham Lincoln. The problem for most of us is that we are familiar with simplicity, but nobleness, entirely appropriate to the language of worship, is not part of our usual experience. Hemingway is often simple, and Milton is noble, but I wouldn't look to either for noble simplicity. Raymond Chandler, perhaps not so strangely given his education, is sometimes guilty of noble simplicity. One might hope that this translation would inspire a bishop to kick a hole in stained glass window.
Has anyone ever done a comparison of the percentage of real English sentences beginning "for" and "so that" with the percentage in translated Latin?
Posted by: Gene O'Grady | December 20, 2010 at 12:37 PM
"the medieval usage that was espoused by the Tridentine rite and to retrieve eagerly the liturgical paraphernalia that had been deposited in museums as historical artifacts.”
There is no "Tridentine rite" nor has there ever been. The phrase is meaningless and ahistorical.
Posted by: me | December 22, 2010 at 11:43 AM
Tridentine Mass- the Mass used in the Catholic Church for almost 1500 years, until the introduction of the Mass of Pope Paul VI following the Second Vatican Council.It is called the Tridentine Mass Because it was codified by the Council of Trent in the 16th century. But the Mass itself is far older than that. The use of 'rite' is irrelevant. It was probably meant as a phrase for particular tradition or practice. The comment itself is misleading as Tridentine is not meaningless or ahistorical. Was the commentor trying to imply that the tridentine mass was never in tradition? Is 'me' Joseph O'Leary?
Posted by: Will Roach | December 24, 2010 at 01:41 PM
The Tridentine express is the form of the Latin Missal produced at the Council Trent. Presume it a reform of the Mass that does away with medieval excretions. Some other older rites were preserved and not obliged to conform to the Tridentine rite.
Does anyone here know precisely how Trent affected the Roman Missal?
'me' is not Joseph O'Leary.
Posted by: Spirit of Vatican II | December 30, 2010 at 12:56 AM
A very brief search on my part turned up this piece, which includes a paper (.pdf file) that goes into more detail on the rubrics of the mass changed by Trent.
http://www.theanglocatholic.com/2010/04/liturgical-abuses-at-the-council-of-trent/
I've always thought that what the reactionaries claim is "traditional" is actually late 19th century/early 20th century.
Trent attempted to return to what the council fathers believed to be a more authentic expression of worship. However, they did not have the benefit of modern scientific scholarship. Ironically, therefore, it's the spirit of the Second Vatican Council that is the more "traditional" i.e. authentic.
Posted by: Brian Gallagher | December 31, 2010 at 05:18 PM
The 'Tridentine' Missal was not promulgated by the Council of Trent but after it (in St. Pius V's Quo Primum). Interestingly QP allowed all missals pre-dating 200 years to continue in use.
Posted by: shane | February 24, 2011 at 10:56 PM
"John the Baptist sang of his coming." This phrase struck me as odd on Dec. 17, 2012, the first time I acutally USED this preface--I am a Catholic priest, and pastor of two small parishes in rural north Louisiana. Googling the phrase led me to your web-page.
You are correct that "cecinnit" from the Latin "cano" has a wider meaning than "sing." I looked it up in Lewis & Short's Latin Dictionary. Meaning II, C is [since oracles gave their responses in verse] "TO PROPHESY, FORETELL, PREDICT." This seems to me to be the best meaning in this context.
On another subject, I am surprised that some of your respondents think the Tridentine Mass is "ancient." Certainly parts of it go back to the patristic era, but other parts are medieval. In fact, the liturgical reform in the 19th century was born via historical study of the Roman rite. The realization of how many accretions there had been led to many of the liturgical changes. For example, what we call "the Roman Canon" is indeed from Rome, from the Fourth Century. However, what we call "Eucharistic Prayer II" is also a "Roman Canon," but based on a model from the Third Century. The liturgical reformers after Vatican II were not radical enough to go back to the third-century prayer. Rather, they adapted it to medieval theology, while preserving a good amount of the original.
Peace to all!
Pat
Posted by: Rev. Patrick J. Madden, Ph.D. | December 20, 2012 at 07:23 AM